Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Pick Your Battles



Until I was eighteen, I had a bad habit of letting people walk all over me. Anyone and everyone. And I would forgive them in a nanosecond if they so much as smiled at me. Once I turned eighteen I decided that this had to change. I was going to be strong. Confident. And I’d be damned if I was going to let anyone push me around.

But unfortunately I quickly swung in the other direction after that. No battle was too small for me to fight, nothing was too unimportant to let go.

It wasn’t until this weekend that I realised that maybe this was just as detrimental as my old childhood attitude had been. Because this weekend I found another battle to fight. It was simple thing, a not-very-big-deal-at-all thing, but I got fired up like usual, ready to make sure that I was not to be wronged.

But for once, rather than getting more and more fired up as time went on, a few hours later I just felt tired. Tired of fighting every single little battle that came my way.

It was time to grow up and wave the white flag. So I did. And while I had to give in to something that I thought completely unfair, I felt a million times better than if I had turned it into a thing. Life is too short to let people use or wrong you, but it’s also too short to fight every battle. It doesn’t make you weak; in fact, sometimes it takes more strength to swallow your pride and let go.

Sometimes you need to give in and move on. You need to save your strength for what is really important, and learn to take life and yourself a little bit less seriously.

Here's to choosing our battles wisely.

xoxo

22 comments:

SJ said...

you start to realise that it gets kind of exhausting fighting all the time. definitely worth picking the important battles and saving your energy!

nancy said...

completely relate to this. used to be walked all over, decided to take a stand, swung in the opposite directions! I don't mean to try and belittle your experiences by relating to ALL your posts, I promise! we just happen to be very similar!!

Meher said...

So true that. Too much fighting tires you off, definitely. :)
xoxo

demie said...

yes indeed. one must pick ones battles. too much wasted energy otherwise...

Krystal said...

i couldn't agree more..

Kathy S said...

Great post. It's so true. Finding that line between getting taken advantage of and being angry about everything is so hard.

Megan (Best of Fates) said...

Now that's something I need to work on - it can be so hard to let stuff go!

Alexa said...

Yeeeah...as you get older and older you realize this more I think.
xo
alexa
www.theshortandthesweetofit.com

kimbirdy said...

i was always taught the phrase: "would you rather be right or be happy?" when i was younger i would secretly think "but proving i'm right DOES make me happy." :) but yes, now that i'm married and living with a boy, i'm facing this "right vs. happy" decision more and more. it's SO HARD to let things go and choose not to stubbornly fight for every little thing. it's definitely something in which i still have a lot of work to do. growing up is hard.

Deidre said...

This is a very timely post, at work today I think there are going to be a lot of battles, and I think I am just going to refuse to fight them. I honestly can't be bothered - you're right, it is exhausting!

ellie said...

Oh, its so hard to do..sometimes. But I'm so glad you've passed on this information. We all, need to rethink the whole ordeal sometimes.

Unfortunately, negative energy can get a hold of you..and turn into a demon. Or so my Dad says.

ellie said...

P.s..thanks so much for the encouragement..in writing. As of yet, I'm not sure I know all the ins & outs of writing a script, yet you'll find most of my stories full of dialogue.

lucy and sarah said...

Its so good to find this out now..than..lets say..a few decades from now. I know people like that.

molly said...

My grandmother was the best at using reverse psychology on my grandfather. She had a way of making him feel it was his idea..when really..she was getting him to do the work for her. Still, I dunno what her secret was.

Loved the post.

Bonnie said...

I always have to remind myself to pick my battles. I'm a fighter by nature. I am super opinionated, and I don't mind standing up for myself or the people I love. It gets me into trouble a lot -- especially lately, for some reason. I have to pick my battles, otherwise I would be fighting all the time!

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Twitter: @GlamKitten88

Kacey said...

Absolutely get this! :-)

Mocha Mornings said...

I am pretty headstrong and stubborn, but sometimes I have to sit back & say, "Okay. Chill. This isn't worth the energy." Awesome post + good advice.

Katie said...

That's a wonderful thing to learn about yourself. We often times overcompensate when we're trying to change. Mazel tov!

Tuesdai Noelle said...

True. I've found out some things just aren't even worth a second look . . .because usually when you give the irrelevant a "second look" THAT problem becomes revelant and feels it can stick around and multiple and morf into other areas where there wasn't even a problem at. I'm teaching myself to let stuff go and laugh at it. Mysery might LOVE company but it hates laughter.

Poppies and Sunshine said...

I agree that we should pick our battles wisely. Sometimes they are just too exhausting and petty to waste our time on. We should put our energy into the ones that really matter. Great post!

Brandi {not your average ordinary} said...

I definitely still have a hard time saying no at times, but I know which battles are the really important ones to fight. That's always a good start, right?

kcomekarolina said...

good for you!cool!!!


xoxo from rome
K.
http://kcomekarolina.com/