Skip to main content

Bittersweet Melancholy

The beginning of spring, as beautiful as it is, comes with a price for me. Because as the flowers bloom and the wind brings sweet perfume dancing around my face, it also carries with it a bittersweet melancholy that settles into my skin.

It never lasts long and quickly goes back to where it came from, to hide in wait for another year; coming back a little heavier than it was the year before.

But it those few weeks I find myself dragging my feet, weighed down with lost friends and summers, memories of places that have never been as magical since. Weighed down with childhood dreams long forgotten and the person that I thought that I would be.

However this isn’t a self-pity blog. The melancholy is bittersweet for a reason. Bittersweet because while I miss them, I have been lucky enough to have these sweet memories than demand my attention for a short-period of time. And so I wallow. And pay them the attention they are craving, because they deserve that much.

And eventually I come to my senses and shake myself awake again with the reminder that there are plenty more bittersweet memories to be made.

And that I’ll have even more bittersweet memories to miss next year.

Which is a beautiful thing.

Comments

Paige Hadley said…
Wow. That's very true. I wonder when I'm thirty or fifty or seventy years old what things I will have done or failed to do, or regret or have done just right, or still be looking forward to in the future. It's even a little bit scary.
October 17, 2011 at 6:19 PM
Deidre said…
I get this way about spring in AUstralia too - but that's mostly because I get homesick. le sigh.
October 17, 2011 at 9:58 PM
Tuesdai Noelle said…
I think my "bittersweet" comes around the end of the year--usually. Whereas I'm not dragging my feet--I'm also not walking any faster. But I do find myself becoming more and more curious/random thinking by the minute to see what lays in these next 60-something-days. I'm looking to be surprised as it takes a lot for me to be surprised.
October 18, 2011 at 4:55 AM
kimbirdy said…
yes, you're so right. all of your feelings deserve the attention they are asking for. give honor to each part of your heart, because each part of your heart is equally valuable. for me, this bittersweet feeling comes at the beginning of fall. every year i lose someone close to me in the fall. i used to cringe at the end of summer, holding my breath to see who would be next, but now i know it's a natural part of life. things end, and things change. it's bittersweet, and it's beautiful.
October 18, 2011 at 7:30 AM
erleichda said…
melancholy is a very misunderstood thing... we need it you know. to create. to appreciate. to write good
October 18, 2011 at 7:59 AM
Bonnie said…
I try to live life with no regrets so there are no bittersweet moments. I hate bittersweet moments, I'll be honest. I like to be happy and fun and kind of insane.

http://www.glamkittenslitterbox.com/
Twitter: @GlamKitten88
October 18, 2011 at 8:07 AM
ellie said…
I'm afraid it can hit you when least expected. But some how, even when we get depressed we can some how come out on top..with a certain ingenuity...which I think is being a woman, perhaps. Hopefully, you can turn to creativity..and write yourself out of it, or sometimes, even cleaning can help (of course, I'll be the first to admit its not my biggest priority & I'm much better at making messes). But just see if you can make yourself a pair of pj pants from an old sheet and a newspaper pattern..you might surprise yourself. See if you can make a great meal ..right from the ingredients in your cupboard.

on a character note...

Oh, I must admit I have it bad for Australia's Sebastian Gregory for my character Jules. Better known as Chili from the Veronicas. I can only hope he goes back to acting. Doesn't he see he can be Austraila's Aaron Johnson.
October 18, 2011 at 8:10 AM
lucy and sarah said…
We often find reasons to beat ourselves up, emotionally. We've had some bad winters here. Snow so bad. So cold. I've cut my hair off before because of cabin fever. It doesn't look so bad. But you have to be careful..you can make life so much worse in times like those.
October 18, 2011 at 8:14 AM
molly said…
So much food for thought. I guess it helps to have holidays to make you want to feel happier, but that can be so trite, sometimes.

Its good to have friends to chat with. Drink tea with and hopefully be open enough about talking it out.

Sometimes, you can find out there are other people worse off and you might have made their day with a smile and a friendly hello.

Thanks so much for your note. See, I write when I'm depressed.
October 18, 2011 at 8:41 AM
SJ said…
i guess nostalgia and melancholy sort of intertwine so that there's moments of happiness and sadness at the same time. there's nothing wrong with that, you reflect and then you move forward only to come back to it again later. it's a bittersweet cycle :)
October 18, 2011 at 9:47 AM
Kacey said…
Lovely and true. I like how you acknowledge that they deserve your remembering but also that there is more to do. <3
October 18, 2011 at 11:46 AM
keishua said…
I think changing seasons always feel a little off kilter no matter how much you love the season.
October 19, 2011 at 1:18 AM
noone said…
that is an interesting post! hmm, I try to do everything I want to do so I don't regret it in the future. So far I think there are no major regrets for me, oh except my belly button piercing lol
October 19, 2011 at 8:08 AM
k said…
I get that every fall and winter :(
October 20, 2011 at 1:48 AM
Ashley said…
I'm working on not letting the melancholy take over!
October 20, 2011 at 6:17 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Guest Post: Brandi of ´Not Your Average Ordinary´

This guest post is quite exciting for me, as Brandi was actually the reason I first started my blog. She was one of my first followers and has been such an inspiration throughout this whole process. On top of that she is the sweetest person ever and such a beautiful woman inside and out. Without further ado, here she is: Ritual I was so flattered when Kaylia asked me to guest post for her. You see, she's one of my favorite sources of inspiration and honesty on the great big blogosphere. I was sipping tea, trying to decide what to write and feeling more unsure of myself than ever. It's been a bit like that lately in my world. When moments like those overwhelm me, I stop what I'm doing and brew a pot of tea. The first cup is reflection, the second poured becomes evaluation, the remaining cups devoted to action. It's one of the best things I do for myself all day, the little ritual. There’s something wonderful about daily rituals – those little times during the...
202 comments
Read more

Guest post from Deidre of Decoybetty

Here is another guest post from a fabulous blogger; this time it's Deidre from Decoybetty. This blog is one of the funniest, most honest, most inspiring blog around (with the occasional dash of delicious recipes to boot). Check out her beautiful blog at www.decoybetty.com and you'll see why she is one of my all-time favourites. Guest post: When Kaylia asked me to write a guest post, I stared at the blank screen and the only things that came to mind is how every post that Kaylia writes, I read along going “Yes! Yes! Yes!”  This girl writes (albeit way more eloquently) what I’m thinking.  But you read her blog, you know how fabulous she is.   She recently wrote about the ‘anonymity’ of travel. I’m addicted to this feeling.  I’m an expat. I was born in America and got my first taste of Australia in the young adult book “Looking for Alibrandi” where a teenager skips school to hang out with a boy which is basically all the things I am not. I’d never skip school and I didn’t r...
189 comments
Read more

Guest Post: Vanisha

Hey guys, here is the last guest post and I couldn't have picked someone better (if I do say so myself). I have only known Vanisha's blog for a short time but I'm already hooked. It's funny, honest and there are always beautiful photos to drool over. PLUS she lives in Canberra and does a much better job of summing up my awesome home-town than I do. Enjoy! Hello! I'm Vanisha from Vanisha's In Life...Australia  Kaylia invited me to write a guest post whilst she's on her fabulous holiday! Being asked to write a guest post almost feels like being invited into someone's home. I'm honored. Kaylia said write about "anything" so I thought I'd write about an amazing trip I recently took.  A lot of people find it odd that of all places, we decided to got to Timor Lestse. Let me preface this decision a little. It all started in front of this fire place in the middle of winter in the Kangaroo Valley. Two acquaintances sat. Trying to get war...
232 comments
Read more