Sometimes I wonder if we’re all inherently self-destructive. If, when it comes down to it, we are our own worst enemies.
Sometimes this is manifested in obvious ways, like eating disorders and alcoholism. But most of the time it’s hidden below the surface. Hidden where no one else can see it.
But the damage is just as real.
It could be nasty comments to yourself: an ‘I’m so disgusting’ when looking in the mirror, a ‘look at how fat my thighs are’ when trying on what was before that day your favourite dress. It could be negative thoughts like ‘no one likes me’ when people are too busy with exams or work to see you, or an ‘I’m so stupid’ when you make one mistake. It could be doing small self-destructive things that others can’t see or can’t see for what they are, like looking at a facebook you shouldn’t, binge eating because you’re sad, or starting an argument with a loved one simply because you need a reason to hurt.
I see it around me every day, both in myself and others. This urge to inflict emotional pain on ourselves, to put ourselves down, to talk about ourselves in way that we would never talk about anyone else.
To judge ourselves in a way that we would never judge anyone else.
To belittle ourselves for being human.
So I’m taking a stand. Against myself. Because it’s high time I started treating myself the way I deserve to be treated. And stopped being such a bitch.
So here’s to giving ourselves a break. And to becoming a little nicer and a whole lot happier in the process.