Tuesday, May 10, 2011

My trip to the doctors...

My recent trip to the doctor was...erm...interesting to say the least. Basically it went something like this (keeping in mind that not once during my visit did I cough, clear my throat, or breathe abnormally).

Doctor: So how can I help you today?

Me: Well I have been sick for about a month

Doctor (interrupting): Do you have asthma?

Me: No

Doctor: Do you have a family history of asthma?

Me: Not really...I mean my brother had it when he was really little

Doctor: So you have a family history. I thought so.

Me (confused): Umm...well ok. Anyway... (Proceeds to rattle of symptoms such as fever, sore throat, vomiting etc...But does not mention coughing, breathing difficulties or anything to do with the functions of my lungs AT ALL)

Doctor (nodding thoughtfully): I see. You have asthma.

Me: Oh I really don’t think I do...I’m mostly worried about the fever...

Doctor (interrupting again): I’ll go get you a puffer

Goes to retrieves puffer, gives it to me and gets me to use it.

Doctor: Now see, isn’t that much better?

Me(lying to move appointment along): Oh yes, much better. Also, do you have idea why I have been running a fever and throwing up?

Doctor: I have no idea.

awkward pause

Me: Could it be due to a sinus infection? Which I get often? Maybe that would explain the fever?

Doctor: Maybe. I’ll give you antibiotics just in case (hands me a script for the strongest antibiotics on the market)

Doctor: Now I’ll just check you over.

I’m going to stop right here and tell you that THIS is where the story gets weird/er. She pulled out a stethoscope and proceeded to practically molest me. I understand that they put the stethoscope to your chest to check your breathing/hearts etc. (though most I go to just listen from the back)

But never before have I been fondled like that by a doctor!!!! She put it on areas of my chest where she had NO CHANCE of hearing anything! I also didn’t realise that they have to openly peer down your shirt at the same time...

Well anyway, after the most awkward 5 minutes of my life (yes, this continued for five minutes) she then sat back down and said:

‘Now I’m supposed to tell you that the antibiotics I gave you will affect the pill...but personally I think that is just a myth.’

Me: I guess it’s better to be safe than sorry *forces laughter* har har har

Doctor: .....maybe.

End of appointment.

40 comments:

SJ said...

ummm wtf?! that reminds me of a friend at work who was telling me her doctor insisted she had polycystic ovaries because she had bad skin (her skin is pretty close to perfect) and said she needed to go on the pill. All within 30 seconds of sitting down!

i assume you went and saw a different doctor after that visit?

Ash said...

Haha! What??? That is so weird. What a bizarre doctor.

Autumn said...

That is weird.

However, I found out I had pretty bad asthma because I get sinus infections so often. I found when I use my inhaler when I should that I don't get them as often and I also don't get as sick (chest cold). Now I can run around without feeling like I am going to die haha.

Sorry for your awkward doctor's appointment.

ellie's desk said...

hahahaa..doctors are so strange..even here in the states..the doc my Mom goes too..his secretary tells her..he no longer sees people with chronic illess..he's only into wellness now.

I totally believe you about that 'molesting' part too..geese..its hard to get good care.

lucy and sarah said...

So bad to hear about this doctor. Wow, I hope you'll find something to help.

That was a very interesting story!

Sara Louise said...

Things you never want to hear your doctor say: "I have no idea"
Really hope you're feeling better soon xo

Brandi {not your average ordinary} said...

Wow. Wild story! I think I would have run away. My favorite is the time I slammed my toe into a suitcase while I was at college and had to go to health services. They asked me 10 times if I was pregnant, then tried to get me to take a pregnancy test. I stopped the doctor there and told him that unless they had medical proof of immaculate conception in virgins, there was no reason for a pregnancy test. That's when they finally let up and x-rayed my foot.

Toni said...

Wtf?! Scary!! And you're right, totally not a normal assessment! Eek :( Hope you get feeling better soon ...and ...of course ...try a different doctor next time. That woman has some serious issues. Apart from the whole molestation issue, the antibiotics absolutely DO interfere with birth control pills. So be carefeul!

jodeska said...

I could feel the awkwardness oozing from your post. And female too! For some reason you'd expect that from a man. Are you feeling better?

The Book Florist said...

Oh dear. Well that sounds nearly as enjoyable (sarcasm) as my dentist appointment - nearly drowned on his fat fingers! (How far, seriously, does he have to push them?) Hope you're feeling better soon, but. Take care.

Krystal said...

oh my gosh! I really hope you get a 2nd opinion!

magdalena viktoria said...

ufff, this is another example of why doctors seem to bereally off lately--sorry you had to experience this! it seems that quality and actual caring of the patient is on decline, and it's a shame. it's our health! I hope you get better, dear. xx

Bonnie said...

I think you need a new doctor.
She sounds like a psycho.

http://www.glamkittenslitterbox.com/
Twitter: @GlamKitten88

Bonnie said...

And an idiot.

Kaylan said...

wow. awkward!!!! here in france, my man called the doctor and told him my symptoms and the doctor faxed a script right away. the doctor never met me or my guy. isn't that illegal? haha we could have been totally lying about my symptoms. although, i am thankful because it saved me a lot of insurance hassle!

Curious World of L said...

oh that sounds dreadful and downright weird. I think she may have a few screws loose.
Hopefully, you won't run into her again.

kimbirdy said...

oh my god, that is horrible! what a nightmare. and what a terrible doctor!! i know a doctor, actually, who has a pretty serious mental illness and is not seeking treatment for it. it was a very harsh realization that as long as you can memorize all the parts of the body, you can become a doctor. there's really no governing body of people to make sure that our doctors are sane or reasonable or anything else other than able to memorize. i'm so sorry about your experience! hugs to you.

Mimi said...

oh my goodness, really?! that is indeed really weird! time to change doctors...

<3, Mimi
http://whatmimiwrites.blogspot.com/

Tiq said...

OMG.. I wonder where did she get her cert from. How scary and a very peculiar doctor indeed.

Perhaps you should go to another clinic or hospital and get yourself a thorough check this time, like a real check up. Take care of yourself dear.

Victoria said...

Seriously ??? Thats crazy !! Well actually, that's how the hospital in my town is as well ! so bad. But now I'm changing my hospital and doctor, and I'm going there tomorrow. I really hope it'll be better !!
And hope you're fever and such is getting better !!

Deidre said...

Oh wow.

I had to go to the doctor to get a physical for my visa to stay in Australia.

The doctor made me take off my pants bend over (which I assume was to check the curvature of my spine?) and then checked out my ass and told me to put my pants on...AWKWARD.

jillian m. said...

Oh. MY. God. Get a new doctor, please!

I had a doctor's appointment recently and he was talking so fast that I just got so confused and started stumbling on my answers when he would ask questions. Case in point:

Doctor (speaking at a million miles per minute): Do you feel any pain above the wrist?

Me: Ummm, no. I feel it on my wrist all the way up to my elbow.

Doctor: Then it IS above your wrist.

Me: Oh...right.

Ha!

Allison Marcia said...

Oh my gosh! I literally just laughed out loud! I mean, that's terrible for a doctor's appointment but it's also REALLY weird.

I love the ending "....maybe."

Say what?

Was it a crazy person impersonating the doctor?

Asthma..... Hahahah. I think I'd look for a different doctor!

vineet said...

aftr reading ur post, if FB wud hv asked me wots in ur mind??i wud hv jus said "WTF", too mmuch

Chelsea Lane said...

Ahahahaha! No words. seriously. I love this. you're the best writer ever. what a creep.y.doc.tor.

xoxo

Micaela said...

oh man i giggled! sorry!!! at least it was a female? i know that doesn't make said fondling any better but i imagine if he was an old man that would be TEN TIMES creepier! still very weird indeed!

i do hope you get to feeling better!!!

ps. i fell in LOVE with your bridesmaid dresses! i just posted my virtual wedding date and you were the most newlyweds :)

http://dolcevitamicaela.blogspot.com/2011/05/wanting-to-know-you-wens-our-weddings.html

the shot you shared was just perfect!!!

Cassidy said...

Dear lord! What a terrible experience!

Olga said...

Doctors can be really weird.

heather said...

oh my goodness! wtf is right! i guess the only thing that makes it a little less disconcerting is that the doc was a woman... not that should matter! i guess i would rather be molested by a woman--what does that say about me?
i did have a pretty sleezy doc experience with a male doc in chile. ugh...
p.s. i loved your wedding photo over at micaela's!

AquĆ­ said...

oh dear lord girl! I am sooo sorry! At least it wasn't a male doctor, then you might have a law suit of some sort on your hands. Isn't it comforting when doctors are delusional AND completely irrational? What a crazy! I hope you go to another doctor just incase! Made for a funny post anyway :)

the runaway romantique said...

Things like this are why I haaattteeee going to doctors :( I had a dermatologist scar me for life. I do hope you're feeling better though :) Hope you're having a good weekend!

<3 the runaway

Holly said...

What a strange doctor! I would have been uncomfortable too! Is this the one you normally see when you're sick? I hope you decide to go to someone else from now on! o.O

Jo said...

Eewwww...on all counts!
I think a new doctor is just what the doctor ordered!

Julia Topaz said...

hahahahaha what in the world

iris said...

Second opinions are pretty valuable. Especially in a case like this...

Emily said...

Creepy. If I were you, I'd talk to the head of the hospitals and inform them of this. I don't believe that is at all ok. What a quack.
Hope you find a better doc soon! x

Ruth said...

Omg! Scary! I'd get a new doctor, ASAP!

Karls said...

I relate! Dr's are strange people indeed.

http://karlosophies.blogspot.com/2009/07/vist-with-dr-evil.html

Brissa said...

how awkward/uncomfortable!!! and how strange for a doctor to completely ignore her patient's concerns. i really hope you changed doctors and never go back to dr. touchy-feely.

Lily said...

This whole situation sounds HIGHLY inappropriate!
Keep in mind though that there are different sites for auscultating the lungs (at least 6 locations on the anterior and ten sites on posterior chest). This does not excuse the awkward exam/consult though. It's strange that the MD gave you an Rx for antibiotics without doing a throat culture to confirm diagnosis and correct treatment. If you have a good MD, she/he will initially prescribe a broad-spectrum antibiotic and then do a culture to determine whether or not another Rx would be more appropriate.

I'm really sorry to hear about this experience.