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The top 5 things in google that people search for that begin with ‘how to be’:

1. How to be happy

2. How to be indie

3. How to become a justice of the peace (okay, so this has no relevance to anything I am about to write. But it IS a good question....)

4. How to become a model

5. How to be anorexic.

To be perfectly honest, this post was originally going to be a rant. The fact that ‘how to be anorexic’ is the 5th most popular search REALLY made my blood boil. Why don’t you just cut out the middle man and type in ‘how to alienate everyone you know, become someone you’re ashamed of, miss out on the best years of your life, and lose a good proportion of your hair...which by the way DOES NOT grow back ever’...

...or you know, something similar to that.

Wow, this did turn into a rant. Oops.

But as I sat down to write this, I began to think. I wasn't angry anymore. I just felt sad.

‘How to be happy’ is number one in this search. And it’s no wonder, if the other results are anything to go by. We are so desperate to be happy, but we are going about it the completely wrong way. Becoming indie, a model or developing a serious mental disorder are no ways to become happy.

Conforming to a stereotype will not help you to follow your dreams or get in touch with who you really are. Neither will getting a job that judges you solely on your looks. And starving yourself to meet society’s ever increasing demand on women to become everything that they are not, nor are they naturally meant to be, won’t make you happy either.

Focusing on looks and weight does not bring happiness. It brings discontent. And discontent leads to unhappiness. Which is why, ultimately, we all end up googling: ‘how to be happy’.

Our priorities have become completely skewed. And until we focus on what is important, the rates if depression are going to keep rising, and we’re going to keep turning to google for questions that we already know the answers to.

Were ‘how to be kind to others’, ‘how to be charitable’, or ‘how to be the best I can be’ included in the top 5 searches, then I can almost guarantee you that ‘how to be happy’ would be much further down on the list.



ps. Oh yeah, and obviously I didn’t end up ‘shaking things up’ like I talked about a few posts ago. I think the fact that I am too lazy to do so says much more about my personality than anything I could ever write....

Comments

vintch said…
such an interesting post. i really loved that "how to be happy" was the top search! i was so sad, however, to see the last one. thank you for bringing this issue to light and for focusing on the positive. have a blessed week, sweet friend!
Unknown said…
I love this! Well said!
Sara Louise said…
'How to be happy' being number one makes me very happy :-)
Kari said…
this is unbelievably true, and so well written!
SJ said…
It's a pretty good reflection of the 21st century really isn't it? We Google everything else, why not how to be happy?
erleichda said…
i do have my little recipe for happines- but of course it varies from one to another- i could only hope so that my recipe could help others http://demieblogg.blogspot.com/2011/06/simple-recipe-for-happy-life.html
Paige Hadley said…
You make such a brilliant point! It's very tragic and true, isn't it? I think one of the most important keys to happiness is loving yourself. And then that covers things like making time to enjoy yourself - and then if no one else loves you, it doesn't kill you, because the one person who matters, yourself, cares very much indeed. That's a major lesson learnt from my art-therapist Dad and counsellor Mum. Kind of cliched, but fundamental, and one of the hardest things to learn. Take care.
hi! thanks so much for your lovely post on my blog. it has made my morning.
i think that your post is really insightful. i enjoyed reading it. although sadly i also know that there are people out there who dont choose to have anorexia- it just develops (my best friend being one of them- hers developed in childhood ). i am shocked that that is number 5 on google!!!
have a wonderful week and keep writing. :) xo
www.mirrorofmyworld.blogspot.com
ellie's desk said…
I like how you ended this..how to be kind to others. That can be rather complicated these days. Especially, after listening to my brother.
lucy and sarah said…
Some very strange things you find on google. Even in the latest trailer "freight night"..the kid googles how to pick a lock on his iPhone..and is picking the neighbor's lock.

Yes, we should be more giving. Good stuff.
Moan said…
Love your thoughts, love your blog.

May I just add my two cents and say, besides agreeing with pretty much everything you have said, that I myself am a skinny little stick, always have been, and I FUCKING HATE IT. It does not bring happiness, only, as you say, thin hair, as well as iron deifiency anemia, weakness in muscles and shortness of breath. It is actually hard to find clothes a size 8 as well I must say!!!
Alexandra said…
great blog you have here!!!
check out my blog too if you like, would be happy!
reflectandfancy.blogspot.com
Jillian said…
It's sad to think that people have to look up how to be happy. It really makes you think about what's going on wiith other people.

On the other hand...how to be indie? Really? Ha.
amy b.s. said…
holy. #5 is totally shocking. so sad!
kimbirdy said…
yup, this is pretty heartbreaking. what's more, is all the stress that comes from depression manifests itself in physical ailments. people then turn to their doctor who just prescribes pills, initiating a cycle of medical bills, constantly feeling sick, and becoming even more stressed. i wish seeing a therapist didn't have the stigma that it does for so many people. if people chose to see someone who could actually help them sort out their lives in positive ways, all that stress could be avoided. of course, i am a therapist so i feel especially passionate about this issue.
Victoria said…
Really good post ! And wow thats crazy stuff coming up. Really sad actually !
Paulie Antiques said…
thats really interesting. why would someone google how to be anorexic?? so sad.
Aquí said…
Wow, I'm in total shock about the google results! Never have I had the urge to ask goggle these questions! Really sad. On another note, I found the last part slightly uplifting. I love what you've said about your personality here. No need to shake it up, thoroughly enjoy your posts:)
Bonnie said…
I have found out that, no matter what you type into a Google search, there will be a search result because someone has searched for it before you. You can type in the weirdest thing you can think of - i.e. how to make out with a tree - and there will be a hit. Or an auto-complete thing like Google has.
It's so stupid.
People are messed up these days.

http://www.glamkittenslitterbox.com/
Twitter: @GlamKitten88
Deidre said…
I find it really quite depressing that we have to use the internet to figure out how to be happy that's not good at all!
k said…
this was really interesting to read...and its definitely sad that those are the how to's that are googled. true words
keishua said…
I am not surprised that how to be happy was the top one and that something pertaining to controlling and suppressing is in the top 5.I think we all want to be happy(and why not) but then we go about it the wrong way.
Ashley said…
"To be interested in the changing seasons is a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring."

^
^
One of my favorite quotes. I think one big problem is that people think they can ALWAYS be happy. Once we start to realize that we will go through tough patches, then we begin to reach a place of balance.
christine donee said…
rant away! i'm so glad you posted this.. it's so true that everyone is looking for happiness, but mostly in the wrong areas of life. Sigh...
Joyti said…
I was pretty horrified by the 'how to be indie' myself...but the last one does make me sad.
I'm not sure how I feel about the number 1. It can be positive or negative - at least people are looking for happiness rather than 'how to be rich' or something more superficial.
Red Boots said…
This a great post, that has really got me thinking (which is definitely a sign of a good post!!). It is a shame that people have to turn to google to find out how to be happy. That makes me a little unhappy. But at least it is higher that how to be anorexic. At least happiness rates higher than the desire to be thin.
Unknown said…
omg! it's so sad!!!



xoxo from rome
K.
http://kcomekarolina.blogspot.com/
Brissa said…
i can't believe that's number five!
thank you for this post! you did a wonderful job on it!
Ashley said…
Well said!

It's so heartbreaking to know that we all kind of want the same thing, happiness, and yet we're to some degree or another, incapable of knowing how to go about making it happen.

I will add on a less solemn note that positive communities, on the internet and out in the world do exist, so there's a lot of hope:) xx
Unknown said…
Congrats on winning my giveaway! :) Email me your address to rosalindrevival(at)hotmail(dot)com and I'll send you your package! Yay!
Unknown said…
wow, such an interesting search! I feel thankful to be a happy girl when there is so much sadness in the world.

xoxo
Ashley Slater said…
WOW and wow....

I agree with you 100%..
I can't even get over why someone would TRY to be anorexic! So sad!
Unknown said…
http://howtobecomeanorexic.org/

I think this site may have something to do with #5.
Unknown said…
http://howtobecomeanorexic.org/

I think this site may have something to do with #5.
Anna said…
this is kind of sad. There's a wikihow entry about it...
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